From: "Jeff Stark" <jstark@nonsensenyc.com>
Subject: nonsensenyc: 12.18 to 12.20
Date: December 18th 2009

NOTE: With hat in hand, we ask for your annual donation to Nonsense NYC. We love this project, and it's paid off in social capital and grateful notes many times over.

Three years ago we started asking for something more: cash. Our annual bills come up in January, and it was critical at the time to not go too far out of pocket to publish every week. We asked for $5 a year from readers, and $20 if we posted your event in the last year. And it worked; the donations posted and we were thankful. We paid the bills. We shared with our contributors. Earlier this year we used some of that money to help us replace a five-year old computer. We titled the hard drive Sustain to remember, every day, that people from this list support what we do.

It's an awkward time in New York. People are broke and everyone is asking for money. We do not charge a subscription for Nonsense because we want it to get out into the world, and we don't want there to be anything in the way of its access. But we don't sell advertising, or sponsorship, or marketing of any sort. That means, ultimately, that we have to ask you -- you directly -- for your help.

Please support us. Again, $5 is great if you read the listings, and $20 if you use Nonsense to promote your events, your classes, or your spaces. It's important to us that you donate because you appreciate this service. Because you like what we do. Because you can afford it. We're not in this for the cash; we're in it for the love.

Here's the url:

nonsensenyc.com/special

We will not publish on Christmas day next week, but we will send out an special New Year's Eve edition with enough time for you to make big holiday plans. We also will be switching email hosts yet again in the new year to help get the weekly email out to you faster.

Thanks for being a part of this list. You have no idea how much it's meant to us.

Yours,

Jeff Stark and the Nonsense NYC staff

Friday, December 18
* The Eternal Christmas Holiday Festival, Brooklyn * Blip Festival 2009, Brooklyn
* The XMAS Pop Sing-Along, Williamsburg

Saturday, December 19
* Zzzion Number Dos, Brooklyn
* Craftermath, Manhattan
* In the Shit Cabaret, Manhattan
* Mickey Western: The American Way, Brooklyn * Unitribe Launch Party and Newsonic Holiday Party, Williamsburg * Hey, I'm Walkin' Here! Staten Island

Sunday, December 20
* The Church of the Secret City: Darkness, Manhattan * The December Hot Chocolate Crawl, Manhattan * Life on Mars, Manhattan
* Hip Hop Subway Series, Manhattan
* The End Is Like the Beginning, Williamsburg

Wishlist
* Artificial Intelligence

Spectre
* Hyper-Adapted

Learning
* The Fundamentals of Cooking

Help
* Holiday Edition

NOTE: For some navigation help, or an explanation for what this is all about, scroll all the way down to NONSENSE. You'll find snarky editorial comments and little bits of praise littered throughout this list. These nuggets are marked with all caps, like this: NOTE. Also, we make a lot of mistakes, especially with dates; you should always double check our work. And you can donate to this project at nonsensenyc.com/special.

XXXXX COVER ART XXXXX

Busted mistletoe.

XXXXX FRIDAY, DECEMBER 18 XXXXX

The Eternal Christmas Holiday Festival

Featuring music, literature, new art, live WFMU sets, sandwich making contests, interactive installations, and DJs.

Each night features amazing new art by Camilla Ha, Jared Whitham, Lauren Weinstein, Patrick Smith, Alyssa Taylor Wendt, and Jenny Gonzalez.

And the Interactive Flaming Fire Illustrated Bible Installation.

Eternal Christmas
525 Atlantic Avenue, Brooklyn
7-11p; $free
Continues through MONDAY
All ages

***** Also on FRIDAY *****

Blip Festival 2009

Trash-bin symphonies and ray-chasing pixel pushers. The three-day music and arts festival returns to Brooklyn's Bell House. Entering its fourth year of celebrating the best and brightest from the realm of chipmusic and its related disciplines, the festival showcases the use of the former heavyweights of computing such as the Commodore 64 and Amiga, the Atari ST and 2600, and the Nintendo Entertainment System and Game Boy to create arresting music and visual art.

Tonight: Reformat the Planet, SID chip synthesis workshop with VBLANK, Disasterpeace, Enso, Fighter X, little-scale, I Cactus , Nullsleep, Rainbowdragoneyes, Patric C.

Check website for complete listing and program notes.

Bell House
149 7th Street, Brooklyn
8p; $15
Continues on SATURDAY
thetanknyc.org/
blipfestival.org/2009/schedule

***** Also on FRIDAY *****

The XMAS Pop Sing-Along

It's a holiday caroling dance party hosted by Santa Claus. DJs in two rooms after including a music video dance party hosted by DJ Santa. All of your favorite holiday song music videos from classics sung by Nat King Cole and Bing Crosby to pop artists including Mariah Carey, John Lennon, Wham, NSYNC, David Bowie, and more will be projected on a screen with subtitles for everyone to sing-along to. We're even throwing in some TV special and movie holiday songs as well.

We'll have milk and cookies, Santa Claus hosting live and in person and contests to win some free drinks and prizes. Wear your leftover Santacon outfit or put on a tacky holiday sweater for a chance at prizes and to make it even more festive. This is one magical/bad ass sing-along. We're gonna bring peace to the world and alcohol fueled good times to Brooklyn. It's like caroling except with better songs and booze. After the show were going to have DJs in two rooms including music video dance party with DJ Santa.

Legion Bar
790 Metropolitan Avenue, at Humboldt, Williamsburg, Brooklyn L train to Graham Avenue
9p; $free
713 419 8462
legionsingalongsgmail.com

XXXXX SATURDAY, DECEMBER 19 XXXXX

Zzzion Number Dos

Small Change birthday blow 'em all down blowout, with stella selectahs Still Life, Reaganomics, and $mall �Hange of course. Plus special late night all you can jack set from my man my mellow DJ Duane. Visuals by Spencer Brewley. Tamales by Laura. Dancing feet provided by you.

Brooklyn Sanctuary
RSVP for address, Brooklyn
smallchange666@gmail.com
11p-stupidly late; $10 all night

***** Also on SATURDAY *****

Craftermath

A traveling, rogue punk craft brigade that makes all of our crafts out of unusual materials (such as tampons, I heart NYC condoms, customized rape whistles, tiny subversive paintings, punk felt ornaments, and more). We're having a craft party and show featuring home made crafts, indie gifts priced right, (no need to go to Walmart or Banana Republic this year), cheap drinks, home made snacks, live musical and burlesque performances by Jessica Delfino and the ChiChiones, and holiday spirit. Neo-feminist fun for the whole family, except for the kids.

Our message: It's good for society to learn and grow as human beings by finding where their boundaries are, and then pushing them a bit further. If they can't do it for themselves, We're here to help. This event is going to be fun, strange and not like your average craft-a-thon.

The Local 269
269 E. Houston, Suffolk, Manhattan
6�9p; $free or donation
212 228 9874
craftermathworld.blogspot.com

***** Also on SATURDAY *****

In the Shit Cabaret

This is not your ordinary cabaret. We've got a different type of entertainment to offer you. .In the shit variety. You know those moments when you're walking down the street and see that crush you've been too timid to talk to you take a breath and as you do you step in dog poo. You keep walking, skidding your foot across the sidewalk to rid it of poo. But you're so distracted that you walk shin-first into someone's bike pedal. Then a plastic bag blows onto your face. In this moment, you are in the shit. This is the sort of cabaret we're throwing... Performers will be in character for the whole show and at any given moment one performer might step into and disrupt another performer, perhaps putting them in the shit. Or maybe they won't, we won't know until the show. Sound like improv? Well, it sort of is, except that the characters we're dealing have something practiced that they are trying to do and except that we are dealing with characters that are more cartoon than human. You will see funny, you will see sexy, you will see absurd. You will feel good. Clown will fill the air and you should fill a seat.

Richmond Shepard Theater
309 East 26th Street, at 2nd Avenue, Manhattan 11p; $5 in the door

***** Also on SATURDAY *****

Mickey Western: The American Way

You've seen them play tinfoil covered art galleries, Western-themed circus shows, 8 hour-long Halloween sets, and parks and parades all over this great land. Now, the Mickey Western Band are proud to bring you their latest work: The American Way. Three months in the making, the album will be presented live, in its entirety, for one night only in the place it was recorded: The House of Yes. Featuring crazed country rave-ups, rocking odes to gambling and murder, plaintive ballads, and a steely, hard look back at How The West Was Won, you owe it to yourself to join in its celebration. With acrobatics and hi-jinks by Lady Circus and the House of Yes, screenings of original motion pictures (starring members of the Mickey Western Band!) by CineGenius, projections and spectaculars by the Junkman, propoganda table by the Chelsea Gonzo and a special acoustic set by Anna Christie of the Sisters Three. All who attend will receive their very own copy of the American Way.

House of Yes
342 Maujer Street, Brooklyn
L train to Grand station
9p doors, 9:30 show; $10 entry includes a complimentary CD myspace.com/mickeywestern

***** Also on SATURDAY *****

Unitribe Launch Party and Newsonic Holiday Party

Unitribe seeks to connect, collaborate, and co-create with existing progressive networks and communities, of all cultures, sub-cultures, spiritual practices, and generations, with the intention of developing a related, integrated evolutionary culture of love and positive change. We do this through art, dance, all music genres, acting, night life, events, open mics, workshops and venues that encourage discovery, connection, growth, expression and empowerment. Let our celebration become a force of positivity and intention in the world.

All night- face painting and henna tattoos, lava light and space projections. Inspirational eco-friendly clothing by Within. With Gourmet vegetarian cuisine and winter cocktails. Beat poetry by Philippe Javier Garcesto, Steven Fox, and Aloka, music by Johnny O and Brian Gibson, Dalanshar, Ekayani and the Tom Glide Space with special performance, Dynasty Electric, Navagante, and an open-ecstatic jam session to close the night.

UniTribe
76 Rutledge Street, between Bedford and Wythe, Williamsburg, Brooklyn 8p; $7

***** Also on SATURDAY *****

Hey, I'm Walkin' Here!

A series of exploratory perambulations through the five boroughs. Or, less pretentiously: Get off your butt and come walk around the city with us.

It's our last walk of the year. 20.09 miles. Come join us on a romp around southern Staten Island.

Meeting point: Underneath the first S in the big Staten Island Ferry sign outside the Staten Island Ferry Terminal, Manhattan 8:15a; $free
matt.burnsomedustgmail.com
burnsomedust.com

XXXXX SUNDAY, DECEMBER 20 XXXXX

The Church of the Secret City: Darkness

I'm delighted to invite you to our next. Our theme will be Darkness, inspired by the winter soltice. The Secret City is a secular church for artists and other conscious, creative people.

We gather to celebrate, cogitate, ruminate and meditate on the nature of art-making and the creative spirit. Part cabaret, part art-church, part salon, each service has a different theme and features live performance, presentation and original work.

We're gathering a great group of artists -- join us as we explore the idea of Darkness and how it relates to creativity. And maybe even leads us to the light. And remember, free childcare.

Theatrelab
137 W. 14th Street, between 6th and 7th avenues, Manhattan 11:30a; $10 suggested donation
churchofthesecretcity.com

***** Also on SUNDAY *****

NYC Food Crawl presents:

The December Hot Chocolate Crawl

Say goodbye to Swiss Miss, because this experience will change your relationship with chocolate. Hot chocolate, that is.

Please join us for the December Hot Chocolate Crawl. We will meet at the southwest corner of Washington Square Park (near the chess tables) and spend the afternoon sampling a wide variety of hot chocolates ranging from spicy Aztec-inspired blends, to decadent Italian cioccolata densa, to sensuous drinking chocolate stuffed with oversized marshmallows.

Hot chocolate scorecard and map will be provided at first location, so come on time. No RSVP necessary. Bring friends or make new ones. Pay as you go. Come hungry, leave happy.

Meet at the southwest corner of Washington Square Park Corner of West 4th Street and MacDougal Street, Manhattan 3:00p; $free
Twitter: @nycfoodcrawl
nycfoodcrawl.blogspot.com

***** Also on SUNDAY *****

Life on Mars

Graffiti art show at Mars Bar presented by Grimace and Mad-Era. A graffiti and abstract art show featuring a diverse group of artists in NYC's most eclectic Lower East Side bar. Since 1984, Mars Bar has been hangout for downtown artists such as Basquiat, Keith Haring, and Lee. Grimace, Trool22, Mr. Blunt, Waaak, James.Top, Jesus Saves, Binho (Brazil), and a dozen other artists will be presenting their works. In addition to canvases, the entire bar and interior walls will be custom painted by the artists to a never-seen-before-scale making Mars Bar a classic New York City living art piece of its own.

Mars Bar
25 1st Street, at 2nd Avenue, Manhattan 4-8p; $free
grimacenyc@gmail.com
grimacenyc.com/lifeonmars.jpg

***** Also on SUNDAY *****

Hip Hop Subway Series

It's the season finale of the Hip Hop Subway Series and it is going to be huge. I want all of you (yes you who is reading this email or hear my voice) to come meet. We are going on the Staten Island Ferry. The goals is to fill up the ferry.

What do you get to experience? The improvised group battles. The most amazing human beatboxers, the emcees, dancers, spoken word artists. The most amazing hip hop open mike. Passengers having a great time. Artists having a great time. And you having a great time.

Come party at what is one of the worlds longest international underground parties, the Hip Hop Subway Series (and we do mean underground). Come party with the Hip Hop Subway Series where the purest form of hip hop still lives.

Back of Times Square downtown 1 train platform, Manhattan 5:45p; $free
646 575 2395

***** Also on SUNDAY *****

Cinders Gallery Presents:

The End Is Like the Beginning

This is a Silent Art Auction party featuring many of the artists who have been involved with making Cinders awesome over the last 5 1/2 years. We held a super fun auction last June that was so enthusiastically attended that we decided to do another one.

Some of the work will be viewable on our website for the folks who can't make it in person but those that can attend should because some pieces will only be available in the gallery. There will be snacks and drinks and good tunes. So come on down and join us.

Featuring Allyson Mellberg, Jeremy Taylor, Maya Hayuk, Kyle Ranson, Mel Kadel, Travis Millard, Daniel Davidson, Caroline Hwang, Leif Goldberg, Eric White, Suzanne Sattler, Jo Dery, Noel Freibert, Blokis, Elisita Punto, Mike Pare, Jordin Isip, Kelie Bowman, Sto, Jessie Rose Vala, Matthew Thurber, Monica Canilao, Jungil Hong, David Horvitz, Nick Kuszyk, Erika Somogyi, Raphael Lyon, Denise Schatz, James Gallagher, Sean Samoheyl, Molly OConnell, Mollie Goldstrom, Diane Barcelowsky, Kyle Field, Kiersten Essenpreis, Tod Seelie, Jocko Weyland, James Morrison, Chris Day, Alison Corrie and more!

Check the website starting today to see preview images and starting bids. We are taking early bids if you can't make it.

Cinders Gallery
103 Havemeyer Street, Williamsburg, Brooklyn 4-7p; $free
718 388 2311
cindersgallery.com/auctiondec09/auctiondec09.html

XXXXX UPCOMING XXXXX

• Transmutation, December 31
• Mean Red and the Rub, December 31
• The Danger presents New Lost City, December 31
• Bootleggers' Ball NYE, December 31
• Rubulad New Year's Eve, December 31
• Alladin Project New Year's Eve Extravaganza, December 31
• Disorient's DX, January 1
• The Annual Memorial Ride and Walk, January 3

XXXXX ONGOING XXXXX

Nonsense is too long. The great thing about the internet is that it doesn't really cost much to run long listings and exhaustive descriptions. It turns out that's ... exhausting. After several complaints and a little deliberation, we're trying a new format: On the first Friday of the month we will run updated ongoing listings in each section: events, learning, and help. Other weeks we're going for leaner, meaner sections. If you're desperate for something to do on an off-Tuesday night we suggest you either look back a few issues ago in your inbox, or poke through our online archives, which you can find under the subscribe page.

XXXXX WISHLIST XXXXX

What have you been wishing for? Collaborators, grant monies, a new home? Please send brief listings to Alita at alitanonsensenyc.com. We only list available apartments, lofts, studios, and one-off rentals -- not spaces wanted.

***** ARTY STUFF *****

• You are invited to participate in a competition celebrating the power of self portraits. Show us yours. Our panel of judges including actor Steve Buscemi, director/producer Chris Weitz, Guggenheim Curator Helen Hsu and Flavorpill Founder Sascha Lewis will select one portfolio of self portraits for the Grand Prize. The Grand Prize: Six months of free living in New York City or $7007 cash, an art-star reception, international publicity, a feature in 3rd Ward Magazine. See: artistswanted.org.
• The Individual Artist Initiative (IAI) facilitates goal setting and career planning for artists. Awarded annually to emerging Queens artists in any discipline, IAI pairs artists with established professional development specialists who act as consultants and guides for recipients in their work toward a specific project goal, career goal, or strategic plan. Applicants will be evaluated on the quality, clarity, and feasibility of the project goal, career goal, or strategic plan that they expect to develop during IAI. The goal may include but is not limited to the development of a business plan for a project, a site map for a website, or a fundraising strategic plan. The deadline for applicants is January 21. More information on the program: queenscouncilarts.org/index.php?option=com_content&task=blogcategory&id9&Itemid)6.
• Analogous invites proposals for presentation at Analogous Interactions events for the International Computer Music Conference, taking place in New York City in June 2010. Works should explore the intersection of computer music and emergent phenomena -- including, but not limited to, generative sound- and video-works, performative ecologies and installations, live-coding and musical improvisation, reality-based games and social experiments, biomedical hacking and new technology, artificial intelligence and chaordic systems. Works should be "nondeterministic," having an unpredictable and/or live element, and should be appropriate for a performance, an installation, or a social event. Applicants may submit more than one work, however, a separate proposal must be made for each. Select "Analogous Interactions" for AI-related works. The deadline for submissions is December 31. Visit music.oc.cct.lsu.edu/author/submit.php to submit work for ICMC 2010.

***** SPACES *****

SHARES/ROOMS

• Looking to fill three bedrooms for January 1. Please forward to any pirates, mermaids, Huck Finns, swamp things, frog boys (toad princesses), or port rats you may know. It's huge and currently houses eight residents and a dog. We share a kitchen, wood-burning fireplace, bathroom, pool (in warmer weather), sauna, and workshop with lots of tools. Live/work is possible and ladies are especially welcome. Rooms are roughly 200 square feet with at least two huge windows. The rent is $800 per month and includes utilities (water, sewage, trash, internet, electric). Call Angie at 201 320 0226.
• I'm sadly leaving my lovely room at 309 Jefferson Street in Bushwick. My roommate is staying and we're looking for someone quiet, responsible, and nice to fill my place. The apartment is one and a half blocks from the L train (Jefferson Stop) and is right around the corner from loads of shops including laundromat, supermarket, and two blocks from the lovely Maria Hernandez Park. Plenty of restaurants and amenities nearby. The apartment is quiet and long, on the first floor of the building. The room has its own door, and the front door opens to the main common space. The bedroom has two windows facing East so it gets lots of light and is quite warm. There's a built-in closet. Hardwood floors. There's a gas heater in the room, but the rest of the apartment (living room, kitchen, and bathroom) can get a little chilly during the winter. There's a private yard in the back accessible through the other bedroom. All in all, it's a great space. Utilities usually run from $30 in the summer to $100 in the winter per person (including wireless). We're looking for someone long-term. Preference would be given to someone around 30 years old, European, and working in the arts, but we're open. Move-in date is flexible and can be any time until around mid January, however I will be out of town for the holidays and only return on January 5. Rent is $650 plus one month's security deposit. We'll be showing the apartment this Saturday, December 19, from noon-2p. Contact Chen, dearcheny(at)gmail.com.
• Starting in January, there is an amazing apartment for rent in South Williamsburg. At 84 Havemeyer Street, at the corner of Metropolitan, above the Change You Want to See, there will be one bedroom available in January and another room available in February. The rent is very affordable and the location is only one stop from Manhattan (three stops from Union Square via the L train, also very near the J, M, Z). Activists, artists, and cool people are encouraged to move here. Contact brandonjourdan(at)gmail.com.

SUBLETS

• I have a huge comfy room available for sublet December 16-January 16. The room is in a huge apartment with a half-bathroom in a four-bedroom duplex with a huge back patio. Williamsburg, Brooklyn, Graham Avenue L train, on Devoe Street between Bushwick and Humboldt - one and one-half block away from the train. Laundry, great coffee shops, organic groceries, basically anything you could hope for or need you will find within four blocks. Utilities are included in the rent price: heat, cable, highspeed wireless internet, HBO. The downstairs is private with a separate entrance. It is perfect for couples, parentals, travelers looking to stay in the city over the holidays for way cheaper than a hotel. Queen-sized bed and huge pullout couch, it's big enough to sleep four very comfortably. Call Marcie, 646 584 4019 or marcie_grambeau(at)yahoo.com.
• We are looking for a subletter for the month of January in our wonderful home in Sunset Park. Your room is $500 and fairly small, but includes a full window, closet, and a clean single mattress. All utilities are included, except we pay electricity. We have lot of common space that will be yours to share: living room, large kitchen, basement, back yard. We cook a lot and have a basic food sharing system going that you can participate in for the month, if you wish. In varying configurations, we try to avoid meat, dairy, packaged foods, and sugar, but as long as you don't subsist on spagetti-o's we think you could get along fine here. We also will be happy to share our sewing machines, power tools, pots and pans, loom, scrap paper, etc. for whatever projects you might want to take on in your month stay. Our neighborhood is low-key and convenient: the R train, laundry and Brooklyn public library branch are a block away, and the N express train is seven blocks away. We are near lots of grocery stores and restaurants, especially great (and cheap) Mexican and Chinese food. We all graduated from Bard college in the past few years, and moved to/back to New York this fall. Between us we work as craftspeople, artists' assistants, educators, and babysitters. If you are interested, we'll gladly have you over for tea or coffee, and see if we're a match. Contact rachelthelime(at)gmail.com
• February Sublet Available: large room in a two-bedroom, Williamsburg, Brooklyn. Located right around the corner from bustling Grand Street, on South First and Bedford Avenue -- a super convenient and fun place to live. Ten-minute walk from the L train or JMZ, or take the bus or bike over the bridge. The apartment is unrenovated but charming, with eat-in kitchen, gas stove, comfy living room with full cable (movie channels) and Tivo. Wifi throughout, good heat. We have two cats who are very loving, it's not a great place for the allergic. A quiet, house-trained dog would be welcome, no more cats though. The room is freshly painted, with two sunny windows and wood floors, and a full-sized bed. Rent is $950 including utilities or $900 if you don't mind helping with the cats. It's a small, friendly and safe building. Share with my roommate, a sweet mid-20s guy who works in book publishing. Contact Alita, alita(at)nonsensenyc.com
• Sublet Available: Large room (17 by 11) in Flatbush near the Church Avenue Q and B trains and the Church Avenue 2 and 5 trains (different stations) available from mid-January to mid-February (exact dates negotiable) for $500, utilities included. The building and the neighborhood are very friendly; there's lots of really great, cheap West Indian food all over the place, and the transportation is really good. There's also a real, honest-to-god living room that's pretty big and doesn't have anyone living in it. Laundry and groceries nearby too. I don't need any pets fed, plants watered, or snow shoveled -- just someone to cover my rent while I'm away and not steal my crap. Contact: Joe at jbkeady(at)gmail.com.
• I have a huge, amazing two-bedroom apartment available for sublet on the border of Williamsburg/Greenpoint, blocks from McCarren Park, close to the Nassau G and Bedford L. The building is pre-war, and everything is super old-school and awesome-looking (the stove especially). Parquet wood floors, giant built-in closets, the works. It can come furnished or unfurnished (at the moment there is one full-size bed, one single, and a cool vinyl futon, desk, kitchen table, coffee table, chairs, etc.). And the best part is the neighborhood. Super close to scores of bars, restaurants, and cafes. It's honestly the best place I've ever lived, which is why I don't want to give it up. I'm going to be traveling for several months, and possibly staying with friends when I get back, so the apartment is available on a near indefinite basis. But I'm open to subletting for short term periods as well. The rent is $1750, and that includes heat and hot water. I could possibly cover the rest of the utilities (including wireless internet) for long-term stays. Happy to share photos. ContactRuss, russjosephs(at)gmail.com/ 646 387 8924.

XXXXX SPECTRE PRIORITY XXXXX

Before we had a name, the Spectre Event Horizon Group used to meet at a bar to commiserate and trade what our business friends like to call best practices. The group has expanded since then, but it remains focused on smartening the crowd mind. There are no subject limits; our favorite is the incredible sci-fi present, or anything that goes toward a better understanding of human behavior and our universe's ecology. Our simple intent is to connect good minds with as much quality mind-blowing information as we can freely locate and create a space for the informal trade of specialized investigative research, presented for the non-specialist.

The Spectre email list, which is a separate group from this column, is a moderated open forum. People are encouraged to join and to post. The list is compiled for Nonsense by J. Sinopoli. Contact us at spectre.event.horizon.group gmail com or spectregroup.org. Here's some of what came in this week:

***** Hyper-Adapted *****

http://spectregroup.wordpress.com/2009/12/17/hyper-adapted/

Synanthropes
http://community.zdnet.co.uk/blog/0,1000000567,10007459o-2000331777b,00.htm "My new favorite word is synanthropy -- the study and practice of creating symbiotic relationships between people and animals. Metafilter pointed me at A Vending Machine for Crows, a project by polymath techie Joshua Klein that aims to put some of the hundreds of millions of dropped coins back in circulation. It does this by training crows to realize that if they find coins and take them to the machine, they'll get food. The benefits of this idea are manifold. Klein posits that if you can get a few crows trained, then the idea will spread naturally throughout the population -- and that means that mostly, human intervention can be restricted to seeding the idea and then leaving enough machines around. That makes it very economical -- especially if the crows remain unaware of the true market value of the coinage they find. Although I'm sure that economics will take over if the idea catches on; if it's profitable for the machine operators, then rival devices will appear offering better deals and a wider range of treats -- and I do hope crows really are partial to ice cream. Is it perhaps entirely smart to introduce intelligent non-humans into our economy? If this catches on, avian mugging will spread from the seagulls in no time flat."

Coconuts as Portable Shelter
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vqFQU7zn4kQ http://www.abc.net.au/news/stories/2009/12/15/2771822.htm "Scientists at the Melbourne Museum have recorded the first case of tool use in an invertebrate animal. The veined octopus selects, stacks, transports, and assembles coconut shells as portable armor. "It comes at a cost, carrying these shells in this awkward way and it's a fantastic example of complex behaviors in what we consider the lower life forms," he said. They watched the octopuses dig out coconut shells from the ocean floor and empty the shells of mud using jets of water. Dr Finn says it is not unusual for octopuses to live inside coconuts but how it uses the shells is unique. "It gathers them together, it stacks them like bowls, covers its whole body over bowls, lifts them up and then trundles along on its arm tips until a predator comes or there's a threat," he said. "Then it closes them over like a ball and hides inside.""

Crow Cam
http://users.ox.ac.uk/~kgroup/tools/movies/crowcamS1_high.mov http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2007/10/071008132804.htm

Betty
http://users.ox.ac.uk/~kgroup/tools/introduction.shtml http://users.ox.ac.uk/~kgroup/tools/tool_manufacture.shtml "In the first experiment, the crows were given a choice between a hooked and a straight piece of wire, and could only get the bucket if they used the hook. On the fifth trial, one of our subjects ("Abel") removed the hooked wire, leaving the other subject ("Betty") with only the straight piece. After trying to use this unsuccessfully, she wedged one end of it under a piece of sticky tape and pulled the other end with her beak -- creating a hook! -- which she then used to retrieve the bucket. When tested with only straight wire, she repeatedly bent it into hooks, using a variety of techniques; it is the first time any animal has been seen to make a new tool for a specific task, without an extended period of trial-and-error learning."

Flocks Show Cultural Adaptation
http://www.josh.is/projects/index.php
http://www.ted.com/speakers/joshua_klein.html http://www.ted.com/talks/joshua_klein_on_the_intelligence_of_crows.html

Teaching Crows (to Teach Other Crows) to Collect Trash, for Peanuts http://www.nytimes.com/2008/12/14/magazine/14Ideas-section4B-t-003.html "In June, Josh Klein revealed his master's-thesis project to a flock of crows at the Binghamton Zoo in south-central New York State. The New York University graduate student offered the birds coins and peanuts from a dish attached to a vending machine he'd created, then took the peanuts away. Klein designed the machine so that when the crows searched for the missing peanuts, they pushed the coins out of a dish into a slot, causing more peanuts to be released into the dish. The Binghamton crows quickly learned that dropping nickels and dimes into the slot produced peanuts, and the most resourceful members of the flock began looking for more coins. Within a month, Klein had a flock of crows scouring the ground for loose change. Now Klein is working with graduate students at Cornell University and Binghamton University to study how wild crows make use of his machine. To Klein, the machine demonstrates the value of cooperating with "synanthropes" -- animals that have adapted seam lessly to human environments. "Rather than just killing off a species, why not see if they can do something useful for us, so we can all live in close proximity?" he said. To pursue his research, he founded the Synanthropy Foundation this year. Someday, he hopes, similar techniques may allow us to train rats to sort our garbage for us."

Previously on Spectre: Effort to Corrupt Birds Pays Off http://spectregroup.wordpress.com/2008/03/08/effort-to-corrupt-birds-pays-off/

Sniffer Rats and Landmines
http://www.apopo.org/bringing_minefields_to_the_rats.php http://socyberty.com/issues/unexploded-landmines-call-for-the-herorats/ "Bart Weegens, from Belgium has found a low-technology answer to the continuing issue of unexploded mines. An army of sniffer rats would save hundreds if not thousands of human lives. Why these rats though? As well as having the highly developed sense of smell important in this work they are easy to tame, breed and train. Plus they are too light to detonate a mine by themselves if they step on it."

XXXXX LEARNING XXXXX

We look for the sort of classes you circled in college course catalogs but never managed to fit into your schedule. And we also look for the kind of things that no college could teach. Cheap and eclectic is the rule, though all rules get broken occasionally, and we especially love workshops, round-tables, and teachers who won't take your work out of your hands and show you how to do it right. One-time listings are categorized, with general recurring classes at the end. We thrive on your suggestions, so make sure to tell us about upcoming classes that you think are nifty-keen.

Learning is compiled and edited weekly by Libby Sentz. Send listings, announcements, and corrections to her at libbysentz(at)me.com.

***** LEARNING: FRIDAY *****

The Fundamentals of Cooking

Carl Raymond leads an exciting course designed to embolden the novice chef in the home kitchen. The class includes an intro to the philosophy of cooking, essential tools of the trade, and the building blocks of technique�everything from basic knife skills to knowing which cooking process to use for different outcomes. Each student will have the opportunity to cook. By aiding in the preparation and execution of an array of essential recipes for any cook, this class leaves students feeling confident, creative, and ready to tackle surprising new things in the kitchen. Class will wind down with a glass of wine and a dish of your delicious creations.

Astor Center
399 Lafayette Street, Manhattan
6-10p; $125
212-674-7501
astorcenternyc.com

***** LEARNING: SUNDAY *****

PCB Design with EAGLE

This PCB design class shows how to use this awesome, free EAGLE PCB design program. You'll learn how to draw schematics, find the right footprint, lay out a circuit board, route the circuit board, and finally prepare the board for production (including successful testing methods). We'll even show you where you can go to have your boards made for fairly cheap. Bring a laptop if you'd like to follow along with the class and create your own circuit. It would be helpful if you downloaded and installed the EAGLE software from cadsoft.de prior to the class.

NYC Resistor Hackspace
397 Bridge Street, fifth floor, Brooklyn 1-4p; $75
nycresistor.com

***** LEARNING: Also on SUNDAY *****

Bollywood Dance for Women

Ina Roy�s Bollywood Bliss class is about tapping into the feminine energy (Shakti) through Indian traditional and modern dance movements to the ever popular music from Bollywood films in India. In this beginner workshop, students will learn about Bollywood music, basic fundamental Indian facial expressions, hand and body gestures, footwork, Indian folk dance, and Bollywood choreography.

PMT Dance Studio
69 West 14th Street, Manhattan
2:30-4p; $20
212-924-5694
pmthouseofdance.com

***** LEARNING: MONDAY *****

Aerial Silks

Special visiting instructor Kellie Vella of Australia's Vulcana Women's Circus will teach special aerial silks lessons for beginner to advanced students. She offers patience and encouragement to newbies, and her eagle eye to advanced aeriealists wishing to refine an existing act or routine. Class will also be available on December 24, 28, and 29.

The Trapeze Loft
91 North First Street, Williamsburg, Brooklyn 6-7p; $?
kvelour(at)yahoo.com
trapezeloft.com

***** LEARNING: TUESDAY *****

Dirty Martini's Burlesque Ballet

One of burlesque's superheroes, Miss Dirty Martini, teaches adult ballet. Students will gain confidence, grace, flexibility, and control in these classes. Dirty Martini is a generous and experienced teacher.

New York School of Burlesque
440 Lafayette Street, Manhattan
6:30-7:30p; $20
schoolofburlesque.com/burlesqueballet.html

***** LEARNING: THURSDAY *****

Afro-Caribbean Dance with Richard Gonzalez

Djoniba Dance and Drum Center is back! In partnership with Peridance Capezio Center, the studio is finally opening this Monday. This Afro-Caribbean class with Richard Gonzalez is a wonderful place to start. From December 21st to January 3rd, the schedule of classes will be limited to these greats: Wednesdays, 7p, African with Marie Basse; Thursdays, 7pm, Afro-Caribbean with Richard; Friday, 8p, Haitian with Peniel. In the new year, a full schedule will resume.

Djoniba Dance and Drum Center
Note New Location: 126 East 13th Street, Manhattan 7-8:30p; $17
djoniba.com

***** LEARNING: UPCOMING *****

Introduction to Upholstery at 3rd Ward, 195 Morgan Avenue, Brooklyn. 7-10p, four Mondays beginning January 4. NOTE: Mention Nonsense NYC when you register (deadline December 30) for a 10% discount. 3rdward.com

XXXXX HELP XXXXX

It is a wonderful thing, to help. Helping strengthens communities and allows you to meet new friends. With that in mind, we look for one-day volunteer opportunities with no long-term commitment required. We want to be open to fresh ideas and think of help in a broad way. These listings could include anything from a large-scale day-long service project to a local theatre company that needs volunteers for load-in; from an artist looking for film extras to a community garden that needs a few extra hands. Our goal is simply to help groups or individuals that serve the greater good in small but significant ways. Unique and interesting job opportunities are acceptable fare for this section as well. Looking for ways to help out? Need volunteers to get your own community project off the ground? Know of any existing opportunities? Send your requests to Rob Voigt at robpastyvoigt(at)gmail.com.

***** HELP: HOLIDAY EDITION *****

Hey y'all. It's that time of year when we might get a few days off work that they call the holidays. Let's ponder some holiday ways to help.

ALTERNATIVE GIVING

Consider alternative giving. We have enough stuff already. No need to go out and buy a ton more for everybody. Lots of people around the country and world are in need, so let's give to them instead. Alternative giving is that thing they parodied in that one episode of Seinfeld, where you give to a charity in someone's name. It's actually quite a bit more special and meaningful than Seinfeld makes it out to be. There's many ways to do this. Here's some websites to get you started.

altgifts.org
justgive.org
globalgiving.org
charitynavigator.org

DONATE

Already got extra crap lying around your house from last year�s holiday season? I bet you do. Want to donate food, clothes, medical supplies, computers, eyeglasses, construction materials, children�s items, or even a frickin� car this holiday season? I bet you do. Check out this amazing list to find places where your donation will be put to good use.

annsullivan.com/donate.htm

GIVE BLOOD

The New York Blood Center reports that the holiday season is usually the time their blood supply is the lowest. Maybe you could take this opportunity to do something about that, and donate blood. We promise you have some to spare.

nybloodcenter.org

BE SANTA

The postal service runs a program called Operation Santa where you can pick up letters written by needy children to Santa, answer the letters, and send them the gifts they would otherwise have gone without. Show up at the James A. Farley Building on 8th Avenue to fill out a brief application form and pick up letters.

operationlettertosanta.com
bit.ly/4Xt0Wh

SEND AN E-CARD

If you�re planning to send an e-card to your friends or family this holiday season, consider buying one of these from Citymeals. 100 percent of contributions go towards meals for homebound seniors this holiday season.

citymeals.org/support/ecards

GIVE A COAT

It�s the New York Cares Coat Drive. The vast majority of homeless persons need a new, warm coat every winter because they have no place to keep one during the summer. If you have an extra coat sitting in your closet that you haven�t worn in two years, take this opportunity to really make a difference for someone who is out in the cold.

newyorkcares.org

HELP LOCALLY

The whole next week but Christmas Day in particular tons of local organizations are working extra hard for those who need a little help. This can include providing food, visiting the elderly or the sick, making or buying gifts for others, and many more much-needed services. Maybe you can think up a community center, nursing home, church, homeless shelter, hospital or other small-scale social service org in your area that could use a hand with that kinda thing, and maybe you could give them a call.

nyccah.org/maps
homelessshelterdirectory.org/newyork.html holiday-project.org
brooklynbased.net/everything/causes-we-can-believe-in

VOLUNTEER IN THE NEW YEAR

Finally, think about how lonely your local soup kitchen or homeless shelter must be in the first week of January. If you�re traveling and unavailable this next week or two, consider setting aside some time in your schedule to volunteer in early 2010.

***** HELP: SATURDAY *****

Angel Food Food Distribution

Angel Food Ministries is a non-profit, non denominational organization dedicated to providing grocery relief and financial support throughout the U.S.

Middle Church's grocery delivery date is Saturday, December 19th and this operation requires LOTS of volunteers. We meet at 9:30 AM. The 18-wheeler with groceries arrives at 10 and we spend the rest of the morning preparing for and welcoming guests who have ordered the 100-plus boxes of groceries.

Middle Collegiate Church
50 E. 7th Street, Manhattan
9:30a
bit.ly/5Ofvct

***** HELP: NOW TO DECEMBER 22 *****

Christmas/Chanukah Elfin Project

Visiting Neighbors is looking for a few good volunteers aka elves to deliver gifts to homebound, isolated, and lonely senior citizens during the month of December. Brighten the season for an older person who may not get any other gifts or visits during this festive time of year.

Volunteers should be at least fifteen years of age. We requires two letters of recommendation for those volunteers who are visiting and delivering gifts to seniors. We would appreciate it if a volunteer could bring a roll of wrapping paper, tape and scissors.

Schedules are very flexible. Gifts can be picked up at the Visiting Neighbors office from 11a-7p weekdays and delivered on a weekday, weeknight, or weekend. Please call the office to let us know when you are coming.

611 Broadway Suite 510, Manhattan
Howie Square, 212 260 6200
visitingneighbors.org

***** HELP: CHRISTMAS DAY *****

Christmas Day Meal Delivery

God's Love We Deliver provides meals and nutritonal counseling to men, women and children living with life-altering illnesses. On December 25th, Christmas Day, volunteers will deliver, by car, meals and Blizzard Boxes to our clients in all five boroughs and parts of New Jersey.

166 Avenue of the Americas, Manhattan
Emily Findley, efindley(at)glwd.org or 212 294 8184.

***** HELP: UPCOMING *****

• January 25-26. The NYC Department of Homeless Services will hold its annual Homeless Outreach Population Estimate (HOPE). Thousands of volunteers are needed to canvass parks, subways and other public spaces to survey the number of people living unsheltered in the city. Just one night of your time will help us collect vital information that is used by outreach teams to help homeless people leave the streets for a better life. Go to the DHS homepage at nyc.gov/dhs for more information and registration. One night, 3,000 volunteers, let�s make it count. Please consider joining us today.

XXXXX NONSENSE XXXXX

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XXXXX END XXXXX

Reveling in the slow dawn of redeeming grace.